


Dean's Heaven

by musmuspanda



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Cheesy, Dean Winchester Dies, Episode Fix-It: s15e20 Carry On, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M, One Shot, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:53:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27696544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musmuspanda/pseuds/musmuspanda
Summary: Fix-It Fic for S15E20small changes and a new version for Dean's Heaven.Just my Version of Dean's Heaven.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 51





	Dean's Heaven

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Zhenka](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zhenka/gifts).



> This work is a gift for "Zhenka" who needs a fix as much as i do.
> 
> ...
> 
> This is the first story I wrote in English!  
> So please be considerate.
> 
> ...  
> 
> 
> Thank's to "Ken" from FB/Destiel Group for Beta reading!
> 
> ...

**Dean’s Heaven**

When Dean opens his eyes, there is a warm light. It's not the place he closed his eyes the last time. Closed his eyes…There was a shot. He has been in a fight. He did it to protect Sam, for sure. To keep Sam safe.

Dean blinked a few times against the bright sky. Memories became clearer. A bullet hit him, only an inch from his heart. Since when do vampires use guns? But Dean also landed a hit. A bullet with dead man's blood weakens vampires. He shot the man in his head, bullet right between his eyes. Sam was safe.

Dean hit the floor hard. But there was no pain. Crazy but the scratch from that freaking rusty nail, who stabed him in his back before, hurts more than the bullet on his chest. There was blood, his slowing heartbeat and Sam's voice loud in his ears. Then quieter, then quieter…

Now Dean is here. The quiet whisper of the gentle wind strikes over his face. There is a sound. The sound of waves. Slowly Dean sits up, his head is spinning like after a heavy blow but it gets better. Well, you can say, dying is heavy. Dean knows he's dead. 

But this isn‘t hell. What place is this? There is sand under his hands, he can feel it rough under his fingers. And there is water. Endless water. The sea. He is on a beach. 

Dean stands up, slowly looking around. This place is bright, peaceful and calm. He feels safe here, even if he can't say why.

No one else is here. Just him. The sunlight warms his skin while the wind whispers with a peaceful voice and the ocean showed a calm surface. There is grass and trees behind his back around hundret feet away. The trees growing in a full forest. Dean could see a hut. Maybe a tiny house made of wood but it seems deserted, even at this distance. He had to go and check it later. But no rush, he has time. 

When Dean looks around, turns his head from left to right, he stops abruptly. He stares with wide eyes. That can't be real, can it? His heart stops for a moment, only to beat harder and faster the next second. 

Eyes blue like the clear sky are smiling at him.

“Cas,” Dean whispers, as if Castiel would disappear if he pronounced his name too loud. 

“Hello Dean,” the other man answers like always, as if they weren't dead and not in heaven.

Dean have known Cas was in heaven. Jack told him. The boy–the new God–saved him from the Empty. And now, Castiel is the only dead angel in heaven. Because he deserves it. Because Cas have done so much, have given his own life to save the world. And Dean. He deserves peace and happiness and safety. That's why Dean haven't asked Jack to bring Castiel back. 

Though his heart screamed for it, his mouth keeps quiet. Because Cas deserves it. 

But now he is here. 

“Cas,” Dean says again, louder this time.

Castiel smiles at him. “Yes Dean, it's me.”

“How?” Dean can't believe it. “What is this place?”

'Cause Cas is in Heaven, right? But this can't be…

Cas looks up at the sky and along the ocean. “You always wanted a vacation on the beach. Sand under your feet.”

Now, Dean smiles too. “So, this is really my heaven?”

“It is.

“And you are here.”

“I am.”

They looked at each other for a long moment, then something bursts out of Dean. He rushes forward, crosses the distance and pulls Cas in his arms, a tight grip around his shoulders. Cas gives in, leans his weight on Dean. Dean missed him. They both have missed each other. So they stay like this for minutes. Feeling the heartbeat and listening to the calm breaths of each other. 

“You are too early,” Cas says when they part.

Dean looks amused. “Well, you know, life is a bitch. My time was over, I think. I skipped death enough times.”

“We all did,” answers Cas. “But now we're here.”

“Now we're here,” Dean repeats.

…

Castiel doesn't stay always. Sometimes he goes to meet Jack. But he always comes back. From time to time, Jack visits them and say 'Hello'. When the 'new God'–boy is something like your adopted son, you have special privileges. 

“How is Sam?” Dean asks.

“Sam does well,” Jack tells him. “He and Eileen are happy together.”

“Good,” Dean smiles. His little brother deserves a normal life. Well, whatever normal can be for someone who lived their life. Saving people, hunting monsters, well, not Dean's business anymore. And thankfully not Sam's. He can have a future with Eileen. That's good.

…

Other times, Dean can meet old friends. Bobby, Charlie, Jo, Ellen, Ash. They all have their own heaven. But Jack leaves the door ajar for Dean. 

Most of the time, Dean is alone with Cas. 

The two live in the tiny house on the beach. It was empty, like Dean expected. Except for the furnishings, which strongly reminds Dean of the bunker. The only place in a long time who resembled like a real home for Dean. 

A big suprise was Dean's beloved car, his Baby, which was parked at the backside of the house. There is a road where Dean can drive around the beach, Cas by his side. A road to nowhere, but who cares when you can drive this beauty. 

The thing about heaven is, you won't get bored. You can just be. Moment for moment. Day after day. It feels good, it feels right. You don’t have to worry about tomorrow or monsters. You don't even have to worry about who you are and what you are feeling.

Dean remembers. Oh, he remembers well. But he was never good at discussing his feelings.

Cas' words were clear in his ears, like it'd only been seconds ago that Cas have spoken them out loud.

_I wondered, ever since I took that burden, that curse, I wondered what it could be, what… what my true happiness could even look like. I never found an answer. Because the one thing I want.. it's something I know I can't have. But I think I know… I think I know now. Happiness isn't just in the having. It's in just saying it._

When Cas started talking, Dean was unable to process the words. “What?” was the only thought – the only thing his brain could come up with. Happiness, what a big word. What a strong feeling. Dean can't image what his happiness could look like, too. But Cas keeps talking. 

_I know. I know how you see yourself, Dean. You see yourself the same way our enemies see you. You're destructive and you're angry and you're broken. You're… you're ‘Daddy’s blunt instrument’. And you think that hate and anger that's… that's what drives you. That's who you are._

That’s true, wasn't it? That’s the way Dean always saw himself. His whole life was so lost and has always been about anger and fighting. How can he be anything else?

Castiel's next words suprised Dean. 

_It's not. And everyone who knows you sees it. Everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. You raised your little brother for love. You fought for this whole world for love. That is who you are. You're the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know._

How? How can Cas say these things? Did he really see Dean that way? Why now? Why is he telling him now, right after he confesses a deal with the Empthy who will take him away. And there is Death coming after them both. Why now? Dean wants to hear the words, but now is not the right time.

_You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you out of Hell, knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam. I cared about Jack. I cared about the whole world because of you. You changed me, Dean._

No Cas, not now. Please not now. You can't leave me. We don't have time. We have to fight. Cas, why…Why does that sound like a goodbye?

_Because it is. I love you.  
Goodbye Dean._

And then the Empty took Cas away. Dean hasn't even a single second to prcocess, to react or to say something back. Nothing. Cas was gone. Dean was unable to do something. He broke down, his heart cried in pain. Cas was gone.

But not forever. Dean is here. Cas is here. They're here. Together.

Night came, the two made a bonfire on the beach. Gentle waves roll in and the stars shine on the water. The sky is clear, a velvety dark blue. And the fire is hot and bright in front of them. It's a warm night, like always here, pleasant and cozy. Rock music's playing from an old radio. It's perfect.

That night, Dean grabs Cas' hand, holds it quietly. Cas looks at him in suprise, waiting, until Dean finally speaks.

“Cas? Do you remeber…”Dean clears his throat. “do you remember the last words you told me on Earth? Before, you know, before…”

“I know Dean. And I remember well,” Castiel said with a soft look in his eyes. 

Dean had time. To process Cas words and his own feelings. There was always something and Dean had always known that it was love. As to what kind of love, he doesn't realize it yet. But now, he knows, now he understands. He wasn't sure Cas can feel this kind of emotion. Love. Romantic love, true love for another person. But Cas told him, confessed his love for Dean and opened his eyes with his words. 

Dean couldn't just jump in. Not even here in heaven. But the new realization and the feelings have grown. Grow like a flower, tender and beautiful. Now Dean can pick them and hand them over to Castiel. 

“I never said something back.”

“You don't have to,” Castiel says. “It’s ok. We've been through so much together, you and I. I'm sorry it ended like that. I'm sorry I told you that way.”

The words sounded familiar in a way, but Dean can’t remember exactly. It was another life. Well, it was life. This is a better place.

Dean shakes his head. “No, don’t be sorry. And it's not okay I never said something. I want to say it.” He didn't hesitate when he finally speaks the words. “I love you too, man.”

He gently squeezes Cas' hand when he leans in and breathes a tender kiss on Castiel's dry lips.

Castiel stays still for a moment, not believing what is happening. Then he leans in. It's sweeter then everything Dean have ever tasted in life, though Cas tastes like herb and a little like the beer they drank.

That's all for the night. Nothing more than an innocent kiss. 

…

Time isn't important in heaven. One day, weeks or just a breath. Time runs differently up here. Feels different. A year can be a day. So Dean doesn't count time and doesn't pay attention to it. 

He pays attention to Cas and all the things that develop between them. Touches and kisses becoming more intimate. They're holding hands now, they kiss, they cuddle, they laugh and listen to good old music. It sounds stupidly cheesy, but that's what they do. And it feels good and right. 

Dean is Dean, like always.  
Cas is Cas, like always.  
But they are in love.  
They always were, now that's clear.

The first time they sleep together was similar to the night when they first kissed. But they end up in bed. Their naked bodys engulfed in a passionate embrace. 

Cas' skin feels hot under Dean's touch. His heart is racing under Dean's fingers when he kisses him deep, holds him tight and enters his body. 

This was followed by many more times.

“Do you have your Angel Blade?” Dean joked one time. Cas looked confused, he didn't get it. Nevermind. Dean kissed him and all other things are not important. 

…

Time goes by in a blink of an eye in Heaven. A lifetime on Earth. 

Dean and Cas were driving around by the Impala to a bridge that crosses a wide river. There, they stopped. Dean can feel it, it’s the right place. They have to be here today.

Only a few seconds later, the two turn around. Sam is here. He looked like the day Dean had seen him last. But how? So many years have passed by. Maybe only for Dean's heaven? Who knows? Who cares? 

Dean hugs Sam first, then Cas. They are all smiling, happy to see each other again. The family finally reunited.

But time has changed things. Sam has his own family on Earth.

“Heard you have a kid,” Dean says to his little brother.  
Sam smiles. “Yeah. He is a good kid. A son. We named him Dean.”

“What a bad choice,” Dean jokes. “No luck for the boy. Hope I can meet him one day. But not too soon.”

“Yes, not too soon,” Sam agrees.

His gaze falls on Dean and Castiel, and on their joined hands.

“I think I have something important to tell you,” Dean says. 

But Sam shakes his head. “Finally,” he says with a knowing smile. “I have always known there is something going on, but I could never tell for sure.”

“Yeah,” Dean agrees simply. 

“The more profound bond and all this,” Sam tells. “It’s great. I'm happy for you two.”

“Thank you,” Castiels answers. 

“Do you want to come with us?” Dean asks. “Take a ride?”

“No, I have to go,” Sam says. “You have a nice place here. I'm curious how my heaven looks like. And I have to wait for my wife.”

Dean cracks a smile. “Say hello to Eileen for me. And come back, visit us.

Sam nods. “This isn't the last time we'll see each other. I will come back.”

“Good. I missed you,” Dean says. 

Sam nods again. And Dean puts his arm around Castiel's shoulder. Heaven brings peace.

Sam is gone.

“What now?” Castiel asks.

“Carry on. We have eternity,” Dean answers. 

They sit back in the car and Dean starts the motor. And they drive. Music plays and Dean turns the radio louder.

_Carry on my wayward son,  
there'll be peace when you are done…_

**The End**


End file.
